If you offer to hold the baby for five minutes so a first-time mom can go to the bathroom, you will still be holding the baby an hour later because she fell asleep on the way there.

If you offer to hold the baby for five minutes for a mother of two, you will still be holding the baby an hour later because she got distracted by the first child on the way there and felt guilty that she has been neglecting her first-born and sat down and read eight stories in a row.

If you offer to hold the baby for five minutes for a mother of three, you will still be holding the baby an hour later because she decided to quick throw in a load of laundry, reorganize a closet, make dinner, mop the kitchen floor, and run out for milk and bread on the way there.

If you offer to hold the baby for five minutes for a mother of four, you will still be waiting an hour later because she is still looking for the baby.

Don’t worry, Passport Part 2 is still coming right up-

Just give me five minutes…